When we left off last week, the hamsters (oops, I mean the houseguests) were locked in a battle of wills and endurance for Head of Household.  The production team varies the nature of these endurance competitions from season to season and challenge to challenge, but in the end they’re all the same.  In this one, the players had to stand on a surf board sticking out of a wall, while a deluge of water fell on their heads.  Last (wo)man standing wins.  The catch?  The last 4 people out besides the winner are on slop/cold showers for the week.  In the end, it was a battle between Brendon, who knew he was a target unless he won; Ragan, who had something to prove; and Matt, who also knew he needed to win if he wanted to avoid the nomination block after last week’s rigmarole.  Brendon stumbled and was out, at which point Ragan tried to make a deal with Matt, but Matt was having none of it.  In the end, Ragan just didn’t have the stamina Matt did, and Matt won HoH.

After Matt won HoH, I figured it would be a pretty straightforward week.  Brendon and Rachel would be nominated in an effort to break up the showmance alliance, and regardless of what happened with the veto, one of them would be out the door.  This was a very appealing prospect for me, because the two of them are nauseating.  But apparently, Matt had other plans.  In an effort to demonstrate what a “diabolical supergenius” he is, he had to frak things up and overcomplicate them, basically making his HoH week a complete write-off.  Instead of nominating Brendon and Rachel, he nominated Andrew and Kathy.  His logic being that Andrew could be used as a pawn to come off the block with the veto and Brendon would go up in his place to be backdoored out of the house.

THERE WAS NOTHING ABOUT THIS PLAN THAT MADE SENSE, MATT!!!  For a guy that is supposed to be the “brains” of his alliance and refers to himself as a “supergenius”, I cannot see anything more short-sighted or idiotic than this plan.  He knows Brendon and Rachel are in a tight alliance and he knows they also don’t trust him and probably want him gone.  He knows he wants Brendon out of the house.  I was with him up til this point, but then his logic just completely fell apart, and he nominated Andrew and Kathy, in an effort to produce this ultra-complicated backdoor plan to vote Brendon out.  Let me just point out the flaws in your logic, Matt.

1. If you had nominated Brendon and Rachel to begin with, even though both would have a chance to play for the veto, if Brendon won it, Rachel would have been an insurance nominee and the showmance would still have been broken up.  Also, it would have forced either of them, if they won, the use it on themselves rather than on their partner.
2. By nominating neither Brendon nor Rachel up front, you left a vote unsecured in favour of the person you wanted out.
3. Andrew might have been a secondary ally for you had you managed to break up the showmance and get Brendon out.

Hubris is what killed Matt in this situation.  He wants to see himself as this diabolical mastermind who is pulling all the strings in the house, talking about how his complicated plan worked perfectly.  Unfortunately for him, and for the viewing public who don’t want to keep throwing up in their mouths every time Brendon and Rachel are on screen together, his idiotic plan didn’t work out at all.  Both Brendon and Rachel were picked to play the veto competition and Brendon ended up winning, leaving nominations the same.

At this point, knowing that desperate times call for desperate measures, Andrew concocts a plan to make the other players think he is against Rachel and Brendon so they’ll keep him around by publicly declaring he is coming after them at the veto meeting.  Unfortunately, Andrew has gotta be the world’s worst liar and worst public speaker, and all he succeeds in doing is convincing everyone that he is in an alliance with Brendon.  Unsurprisingly, Brendon does not use the veto and nominations stay the same.

Which brings us to eviction day.  By this point, Andrew has lost his shit a little bit.  His fake falling out with Brendon backfired and he pretty much knows he’s going home, so decides to go down swinging with the most hilarious final plea speech ever.  He exposes Kristen and Hayden’s secret showmance to the rest of the house and calls them out for slagging Enzo and a few others behind their backs.  He gets voted out.  In her farewell message, Rachel accuses Andrew of trying to come between her and her man.  I imagine that everyone else will get the same echo of this broken record until she finally leaves the house, because she’s such a self-centered crazy fucking bitch that she actually believes anyone has a stake in her ridiculous relationship with Brendon beyond wanting to break up their alliance or just being plain nauseated by them.  NO ONE wants to come between you and “your man” bitch, they’re just tired of fucking looking at you.

Meanwhile, we get a few words from Matt’s wife at home (maybe if he wins the $500k he could get her some cosmetic dentistry work done), who says she didn’t know her husband was going to lie about her having a rare medical condition to the other players, and says she disapproves of him doing so.  Good for you, Stacey!  You admit you’re married to a sociopathic douchebag with very little moral character.  You sure can pick ‘em.

And finally, the Head of Household competition … it’s a memory/speed competition where players face off and have to ring in with a buzzer that corresponds to one of three answers.  The first one to ring in with the correct answer wins the round, the loser is eliminated, all the way down to HoH.  SOMEHOW, Rachel manages to win ANOTHER HoH competition, the second one in two weeks.  I hate the Brigass and would love to see a couple of them up on the block, but honestly, given that this means another two weeks at the very least before either Rachel or Brendon might possibly leave the house, it really hurts.  BECAUSE THEY ARE SO ANNOYING!!!!  Brendon actually told Rachel he loved her in the last episode.  What is wrong with these people?  I’m starting to think he’s as desperate and deluded as she is.  What I don’t understand is how any reasonable man (and Brendon does seem to be a pretty intelligent, nice looking and stable person, aside from this ridiculous showmance) could be attracted to that, either physically or mentally.  The woman is a train wreck.

I don’t follow the live feeds so I don’t know yet who Rachel nominated, and won’t find out until tomorrow night’s episode, but my money is on Kristen and Hayden.  After Andrew called them out, it was obvious that Rachel was targeting them in the HoH competition, and we already know Rachel has problems with relating to the other women in the house.  It would be an easy set of nominations that really won’t ruffle too many feathers, I don’t think.  The rest of the Brigass wants Kristen away from Hayden anyway.  Matt is another possibility, although I think he did manage to curry some favour with them by not nominating them last week, even though he did want to backdoor Brendon.  So that’s my prediction.  Enjoy tomorrow’s episode and see you next week!